Thursday, April 23, 2009

Paranoia, Paranoia

(Did "everybody's coming to get me" just run through your head? No? Ok, nevermind.)

The other day, I was checking out at a lane with a live person, not self-checkout. Can you believe it?!

Anyway, the lady keeps talking to Sam and telling me how cute she thinks he is. He's vacillating (10 pt. word) between flirting with her and almost falling out of the cart to push the buttons on the credit card swiper machine.

"Is he yours?" she asks.

I sort of chuckle and say "yea, he is."

According to Bob, that was just her best way of trying to find out if I was the un-married, pregnant mother of a toddler or simply a babysitter or aunt.

Again...with the ring paranoia. I'm ready to have them back.

I know Rachel's with me on this. Anybody else? Do you ever "ring-check" a pregnant lady and wonder? I know I do. And yes, I know that I'm paranoid because I'm guilty of it.


julie said...

not to make you worry... but yes. i check and wonder :/ BUT then i actually try to look at her neck sometimes too. especially if she's pregnant. because i know my sister had to take hers off.

i worry about when i'll have to take mine off. especially since i'll be getting big in the summer. when did you with sam?? my sister waited too long the first time and had to get it sawed off by a jeweler. no thank you.

julie said...

ps - i didn't write WHY i check their neck -- it's b/c sometimes women wear them on a necklace.

k - just didn't want to sound like a creeper.

The Wilky Way said...

i do check too! with my last pregnancy i had to take mine off towards the end bc my hands were too swollen. i hated the thought that people would check my hand!

Beth said...

My solution to this problem when I was pregnant was to buy a much larger, and quite cheap, "wedding band." (It was a plain, simple, sterling silver band. I think it was $6 on sale! And it may have been a size 9 or 10! HA!) I just HATED the thought that people were looking at my naked ring finger... and wondering! Even though it was a "fake," I felt MUCH better!

Lauren said...

I used to check, until I got so swollen with Mac that I couldn't wear my own ring anymore. I think I ended up going to Claire's and getting a sterling silver solid band that would fit on my finger, because I was so paranoid then. But now...(shrug). :o)

Alicia said...

I'm totally paranoid. I tend to sleep with my rings off....I don't know why....and a couple of times I have forgotten to put them back on before leaving the house. It's horrible. I always feel like people are looking at me with Shiloh and judging me. Especially since I even get questioned sometimes with my ring on. With my hair pulled up and a sweatshirt or tshirt on people tend to think I'm about 18.

Where in the World are the Powells said...

All the time...I even got a cut on my finger a few weeks ago right above my ring, it hurt so bad, but I REFUSED to go out in public without it on and my protruding belly...Ryan thought I was being silly, but I know what I think when I see a bare finger on a pregnant woman...It's so horrible!!!

BTW: got the invitation today, so cute! Thank you!!!

Lindsay said...

I definitely check and am very paranoid about being seen pregnant without mine on. I was leaving to go maternity clothes shopping the other day and got about five minutes down the road when I realized I forgot my rings. I turned around to go get them. I was not about to trot into motherhood maternity with my baby and baby bump without my wedding rings on! I've also made sure my rings were very visible to the cashier every time I've had to go buy a pregnancy test :).

Greta said...

Julie - I'm glad you clarified because I thought you were just looking to see if their necks were fat.

Rebecca, Beth & Lauren - I wore mine (with Sam) until I thought I would wake up unable to get them off. Then I bought a cheap, obviously fake and large ring from Claire's. I guess I thought it was funny.

Alicia, Grace & Lindsay - Right there with ya! I've been sleeping without mine on to hopefully keep my fingers from swelling too much. I've forgotten them quite a few times and seriously considered going home to get them.

Also, I should say...there are definitely things that people could assume I am that are worse than an unmarried mother. And you really never know what someone's "story" may be.

Jorge said...

well having known quite a few unwed mothers I consider their bumps a badge of honor, not to sound trite, because they chose LIFE. from that perspective its a celebration. So whenever I see a preggers without a ring I think, either she has gotten too big for her rings or she is one brave soul that is willing to take this gift no matter how hard it will be.

HOWEVER, I still got a little paranoid myself..and just bought a wedding band from a kiosk in the mall. In fact, after three children I haven't been able to wear my diamond. But I am working on that with p90x! ha. but im beginning to think fingers are like hips..after babies they dont return to normal.

Rachel Garcia said...

sorry.. didn't realize I was signed in as Jorge..

Bek* said...

that's hilarious

Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah said...

It never even occurred to me to ring check a pregnant lady.

I think if I ever noticed one wasn't wearing one I would just assume she was swolen.

I know I couldn't wear my rings for the last several months of my pregnancy.

Greta said...

Rachel - I completely agree with you that a girl/woman who chooses life is to be commended for her decision. It, no doubt, would take a huge amount of courage.

However, and I thought about mentioning something along these lines, I'm really not looking in judgement, it's purely information gathering. And like I said in my previous comment, there are various reasons why someone wouldn't have a ring on.

Anyway, I just wasn't really headed in that direction with this post BUT I wanted to make sure and clarify the point.

Thanks for your comment :).

Rachel Garcia said...

greta (aka gorgeous pregnant lady)..

this is what I hate/loathe/disgust about blogs and comments.. I sure wish that you could hear my tone when I am typing.. the tone of what I am trying to convey.. I sure hope you didn't take me as preachy. I guess I got on a rabbit trail and didn't think for a second that you were standing in judgement of those single moms. I know we aren't bff's but I've gotten to know you, via blog, enough to know that isn't your heart.

I guess my point was more of I don't really think I think twice when I see a preg. woman without a ring. Either way you got life and so it's a celebration. No one should feel condemned by others bc If Christ is for you.. who can be against you?

anyhoo.. i would bend over backwards to say I hope I didn't offend you.. pregnant or not, but especially while pregnant! ha!

Greta said...

No, no, no - not at all offended!
I just wanted to make sure I was clear in case anyone else was thinking along the same lines as you :).

We are still buddies!

Ann Marie said...

I am SO guity of this...especially since I work at an OBGYN....